Hi veeaye,
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Originally Posted by
veeaye
I think divine awareness or enlightenment is a wonderful thing to pursue, but it isn't my soul intention in all of this.
Throughout my whole life, i self sabotaged myself with fear, and I suffered allot and had regret. I had so many thing's I wanted to do but i kept failing.
After ten years this gets really frustrating.
So are you saying that by raising your kundalini that your fears and unwanted behaviors will go away or does this process involve learning some techniques on how to do this?
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I didn't want to spend m whole life doing affirmations, so I did kundalini to make it all come up - I wasn't completely aware of the effects but with my determination to succeed I will be done with it by the end of this year or sometime during the next. It takes most people around 7 years, btu I jam my brain with everything and push it until it evolves faster.
Affirmations are only useful (IMHO) to reinforce change not to cause change. They usually don't work to cause change because there is a part of the person that doesn't believe the words of the affirmation. The mind is saying, "Ya but..." . It's not enough to know that we want change, we need to know how to make the change. Maybe raising the kundalini pushes you in the direction to seek that knowledge?
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i want to live my life in accordance to my desires, when there's an opportunity right before me, I want to see it. When there is potential to have a great friend or lover, I want to be able to meet them. I want to feel good enough to stay with my education and to even work. I want to be a normal functioning person but have this special awareness of everything in my world so that I can make better choices and reap better outcomes and this is why I'm doing kundalini.
These certainly are good goals. Are you making some progress in this area?
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Because most people are blinded by their ego to some degree, weather they know it or not, and I certainly know I was.
It's not something that one can over come just once and then never again. It sneaks up on you when you least expect it and then WHAM! :BangHead:
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As far as I know, kundalini doesn't make you completely enlightenned, enlightenment is much more work. But it gives you the tools to really successfully operate in a crazy world.
What kind of tools? NLP, for example, gives you knowledge on how your mind works and understanding on why we do the crazy things we do. It also gives the person the capability to make the change - it fills in the "how to". I must be misunderstanding something because I'm thinking that all the raising the kundalini would do is help you become more aware. Perhaps the effects are cumulative, like the strength builds from all the ordeals you have to over come? Am I on the right track here?
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If you are like me and you have constantly been sabotaged by fear, it's worth looking at. That being said, it's not something you want to force into being. Sometimes I regret doing it and wish I left it till later when my life was stable and I was more ready. The reason for this is that I am still in situations which I would say are the results of the thoughts I once thought, for example, I have a crazy neighbour that tries to scare me into not calling the police because of his loud music. This sort of thing turns on the moral reflex, which is bad. Going through these challenges and having an awakened kundalini and being determined to sort through everything while still trying to get on with your life puts you on overload. Lately because of the stress and extra entropy, I've been having minor car accidents and just randomly falling asleep at odd times of the day. I know I am going through too much, but now that I have awakened my kundalini, I know that I have no choice.
That's a lot of stuff to deal with at once. I'm particularly concerned about the falling asleep at odd times of the day. I'm also concerned about the constant stress level because stress can do awful things to your body. Lack of sleep and stress can lead you to too early a death. Maybe you could use some medical help to get things stabilized so that you can continue on your journey without having to fight the current so much?
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I also noticed that I am very sensitive. This is strange because I thought kundalini would make me stronger.
The strength comes from recognizing your perseverance and accomplishments you have achieved so far. It comes from adopting a particular perspective on life (surviving and thriving). With strength comes determination. I think you have it, you are just not seeing it.
You may be increasingly sensitive as a result of the effects of the stress causing biochemical havoc in your body. Stress lowers your serotonin level, which affects your mood, sleep and ability to concentrate. Antidepressants will help bring your biochemistry back to normal while you work on the other aspects of moving forward. Alpha sessions on the AVS may help raise your serotonin level but I don't know if it would be enough to make a lasting change. Maybe - maybe you need additional tools.
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I guess there is this temporary sensitising stage. Thing's tend to stay in my head more so I do my best to keep away from drama, negative people, bad substances, TV and anything really that reminds me of anything negative. Though I can't always do that and dealing with dramatic friends is a real challenge. But I'm not going to lock myself up in a cave and meditate my whole life. I live in the real world. So i have to learn to cope on a new level, a deeper more aware level. I wouldn't go back though, knowing how many limiting beliefs and thoughts that are in the human body which obviously translate to having lower energy fields and more limitation in life - I don't want to live with those limiting beliefs. Most people aren't aware of them because we are really good at suppressing. Kundalini will throw everything at you and see how well you deal with it, unless you already have. I feel like a volcano full of lava of issues. But I know eventually it will come to an end, I will be at peace and one with my inner soul. It's about getting yourself off auto-pilot completely, and becoming a more conscious and in control of your destiny, being. All way's work, but eventually (I believe) every human being in every solar system will eventually find that they can only go so far before they must engage in this practice. It's ultimate evolution - I beleive.
I agree with what you are saying. It is worth while to open the door and do the work necessary so that you can live in peace and happiness. Part of the work is finding the tools you need to balance mind and body.
You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for. You have survived some pretty serious ordeals. I hope you find a solution to the idiot with the loud music. :violent1:
M.